It's official--My braces have officially become uneventful and *gasp* boring. I hereby surrender to writer's block and repost this blast from the past from my Facebook. Enjoy. Again.
Pulchritudinous. What an ugly word to describe something so...what? Beautiful? Seriously? Yes, that is correct. This word is an adjective used to describe someone with great physical beauty. Now, I'm not a linguist or the least bit interested in the origin of words. I only know this word because it was on the GRE and frankly, who can forget a word like that? As Urban Dictionary points out, one reason why the definition of pulchritudinous is so surprising is because it sounds like "something unpleasant on the bottom of your shoe." Merriam-Webster states that pulchritudinous has origins in 15th century Middle English, having been derived from the Latin term for beauty, pulcher. Again, ah-whoooo? I call bally-hoo. I imagine it coming out of the mouth of a 15th century Middle Englishman, sure. But the scenario I envision involves said 15th century Middle Englisman, drunk with mead, stumbling up to a beautiful, young maiden and trying to say something like "My, you're full of goodness." But instead, his buddies heard "Eh 'er pulchritudinous." Aye! Geoffrey just invented a word! So, the true origin of a confusing word rests in the berth of the confusion of words.
Why the jib-jab over the confusion of words? Well, for one, I have been trying to learn a few Italian phrases and have been bewildered over where some of them come from. For instance, "per favore" for please, obviously makes sense since it sounds like the Spanish "por favor". But then Parla Inglese, which means, do you speak English, looks more similar to the French "Parlez-vous Engles?" And sinistra, obviously from the Latin "sinster" for left. COME ON!!! STICK TO AN ORIGIN, PROSZE (Polish for please)!! O Lord, your confounding the language of your people for building the Tower of Babel carries through its punishing effects still today!
The second reason is that after eight months of bracefacefullness, I have finally done what most brace wearers fear the most aside from excruciating pain after adjustments. And that is, I spit on someone while talking. Yes. So pathetic, I know. But I have now started salivating on the level of a pitbull terrier at a junk yard. It came right out and caught the poor girl on the arm. Well, her shirt sleeve. It did not touch flesh, but still. She saw it. I saw it. I felt it happening in slow motion but could do nothing to stop the liquid projectile that shot forth from my mouth. After a jovial admonishment and an embarrassed apology from yours truly, we continued our conversation with me holding my hand in front of my mouth. I know, I said in my last blog that I would no longer do that. That I would be proud of my gap teeth. But this has nothing to do with the sultry goddess-like powers of gap teeth. This has everything to do with public safety. God knows I would not want to hurt someone or get sued in the process. The spit blocking undoubtedly makes my speech sound muffled and may confuse my words. But this is a small price to pay to protect the public from uninvited preemptive liquid projectile strikes. So, if you see me in the future and I am holding my hand in front of my mouth while talking, be advised that it is not halitosis. It is merely my sacrificing my dry hand to save your skin, or shirt, whatever. Good grief. I wonder what is going to happen when I finally have to wear rubber bands. Stay tuned. It is bound to be eventful! Ciao, bella!
Pulchritudinous. What an ugly word to describe something so...what? Beautiful? Seriously? Yes, that is correct. This word is an adjective used to describe someone with great physical beauty. Now, I'm not a linguist or the least bit interested in the origin of words. I only know this word because it was on the GRE and frankly, who can forget a word like that? As Urban Dictionary points out, one reason why the definition of pulchritudinous is so surprising is because it sounds like "something unpleasant on the bottom of your shoe." Merriam-Webster states that pulchritudinous has origins in 15th century Middle English, having been derived from the Latin term for beauty, pulcher. Again, ah-whoooo? I call bally-hoo. I imagine it coming out of the mouth of a 15th century Middle Englishman, sure. But the scenario I envision involves said 15th century Middle Englisman, drunk with mead, stumbling up to a beautiful, young maiden and trying to say something like "My, you're full of goodness." But instead, his buddies heard "Eh 'er pulchritudinous." Aye! Geoffrey just invented a word! So, the true origin of a confusing word rests in the berth of the confusion of words.
Why the jib-jab over the confusion of words? Well, for one, I have been trying to learn a few Italian phrases and have been bewildered over where some of them come from. For instance, "per favore" for please, obviously makes sense since it sounds like the Spanish "por favor". But then Parla Inglese, which means, do you speak English, looks more similar to the French "Parlez-vous Engles?" And sinistra, obviously from the Latin "sinster" for left. COME ON!!! STICK TO AN ORIGIN, PROSZE (Polish for please)!! O Lord, your confounding the language of your people for building the Tower of Babel carries through its punishing effects still today!
The second reason is that after eight months of bracefacefullness, I have finally done what most brace wearers fear the most aside from excruciating pain after adjustments. And that is, I spit on someone while talking. Yes. So pathetic, I know. But I have now started salivating on the level of a pitbull terrier at a junk yard. It came right out and caught the poor girl on the arm. Well, her shirt sleeve. It did not touch flesh, but still. She saw it. I saw it. I felt it happening in slow motion but could do nothing to stop the liquid projectile that shot forth from my mouth. After a jovial admonishment and an embarrassed apology from yours truly, we continued our conversation with me holding my hand in front of my mouth. I know, I said in my last blog that I would no longer do that. That I would be proud of my gap teeth. But this has nothing to do with the sultry goddess-like powers of gap teeth. This has everything to do with public safety. God knows I would not want to hurt someone or get sued in the process. The spit blocking undoubtedly makes my speech sound muffled and may confuse my words. But this is a small price to pay to protect the public from uninvited preemptive liquid projectile strikes. So, if you see me in the future and I am holding my hand in front of my mouth while talking, be advised that it is not halitosis. It is merely my sacrificing my dry hand to save your skin, or shirt, whatever. Good grief. I wonder what is going to happen when I finally have to wear rubber bands. Stay tuned. It is bound to be eventful! Ciao, bella!
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